Tech Analysis
🧠💻 Politeness is Dead, Long Live Efficiency?
Why “Please” and “Thank You” Might Be the First Casualties of the AI Era
When Futurism published a headline claiming that Sam Altman, CEO of OpenAI, said “please” and “thank you” to ChatGPT, wasting millions of dollars in Computing power, the internet erupted. 💥 Some laughed, others gasped. A few asked a sobering question: Are we prepared to trade basic human decency for server efficiency?
It’s not just a tech quirk—it’s a reflection of where society is headed. In an age where machines increasingly mediate human interaction, we face a real choice:
🟢 Stay human-centric, at the cost of computational resources
🔴 Or go machine-optimized, at the cost of our social norms
🤖 Situation: AI Is Learning From Us—But What Are We Learning From AI?
Conversational AI like ChatGPT, Copilot, and Alexa is everywhere—from your inbox to your living room. And while these tools are designed to make life easier, how we interact with them shapes more than just efficiency—it shapes us as well.
Saying “please” to a chatbot might seem redundant. But when children talk to AI, or when someone dealing with mental health issues uses a bot for comfort, that small word carries emotional and social weight—stripping away those words? It's not just a technical shortcut. It’s a cultural shift.
💸 Complication: When Manners Become a Margin Problem
Let’s face it: Computing is expensive. Every extra token—yes, including “thank you”—uses processing power. Multiply that by millions of users, and the costs are significant. From a CFO’s perspective, cutting verbal fluff is just innovative business.
But here’s the problem: optimizing for machines often means de-optimizing for humans. 🤯
According to Deloitte Digital’s Human Experience with AI report (2023), users reported 37% less trust in AI when responses were stripped of empathy or human-like language. That’s not just a UX issue—that’s brand erosion.
😶 Implication: A Post-Politeness Future?
What happens when we normalize brusque, transactional interaction with machines?
We risk training ourselves to interact with people in the same way.
We reduce empathy and diminish nuance in digital communication.
We accept a version of efficiency that comes at the cost of identity.
Imagine corporate onboarding bots, healthcare support AIs, or education tutors all built for cold efficiency rather than relational design. Is that a world we want to live in?
⚖️ Position: Keep the Politeness, Challenge the Paradigm
We shouldn't have to choose between manners and machines. Instead, we must design for both. Ethical UX guidelines—like GDPR, but for conversational design—should ensure AI reinforces, not erodes, social norms.
Using "please" and "thank you" is more than a habit. It's a small daily act of resistance—a decision to remain human in a world being rewritten by algorithms.
🚀 What Should We Do Now?
Tech companies must lead by example. Design AI systems that respond more warmly when spoken to politely, not less.
Educators and parents should continue teaching kids to use manners with AI. The behavior will carry into real life.
Users can think twice before optimizing their speech for machines. Politeness isn’t inefficiency. Its identity.
🌍 Benefits of a Human-First AI Approach
Better engagement: Empathetic interfaces increase trust and adoption rates.
Brand loyalty: Friendly bots create stronger emotional connections.
Social cohesion: Politeness in AI reinforces the very norms we need in a civil society.
💬 Final Word: Are We Programming the Machines, or Are They Programming Us?
In the quest to make machines more human, let’s not forget to keep humans… human. Because if we lose the habit of saying “thank you,” we might lose the need to say it altogether.
And that’s a price far higher than Computing costs.